New year, new start as most people commit to. But only a handful manage to succeed.
My hope for 2014 was to try a relationship with my “Mr Big”. it was clear it wasn’t going to happen. So to get my mind off him I went on dates. Lots of them. Some fantastic, some okay and few terrible, very terrible.
I had one guy who wanted to be his sub in EVERY WAY. Me being me, I played along with it during the date. I find it fun, “hitting” their spot. Watching their facial expressions.
There was another guy, whom at the age of 27 has had 11 “serious” relationships and wanted me to be no12 after two dates! I somehow managed to get out of that one.
The worst date in history let alone 2014 was Nick, a 32 year old aspiring chef. It sounds good so far right?
It was in March him and I went on a blind date. Wes spoke a few times on the phone. The conversation didn’t flow too badly. However, I could always hear him whispering something when we would hang up. Things like “fuck”. I just assumed he must have forgotten something.
We met at the station and there he was. An extra from skins. He was extremely fidgety, pulling his jumper and coat like a five-year-old way. As we had a drink in a bar, all I could think of is ways to get out of the date. Too late, he asked where we should go for dinner. This sounds bad, but I didn’t want any more people looking at us. It was a “why is she with him?” look. I am not a snob, I’ve been with builders etc. However, this was different, he was on edge like he was on some drugs.
For the first time ever I was lost for words. So I said to myself, think like a girl. This is where American television has it’s purpose.
I asked simple things, such as how many kids he wanted? Three he said. As I sipped my drink, I asked him how soon do you envision this? “Two years he smiled”. I wanted to cry, as I slightly choked on my drink. I nearly shouted “ it won’t be me, so I am off”. I managed to keep my big mouth shut. Moving the questions I along, I asked how many siblings he has. A neutral question, nonpushy. Out of nowhere he loudly whispered “ I can’t do this..”. My head was shouting “GET OUT MISSY”. It was that moment in time I wish I had a code with a friend to get us out of bad dates.
As he went to the bathroom, I frantically searched my purse. I had no cash. I couldn’t walk out and not pay towards dinner. What if he tried to call me? I can’t handle the drama! As he reappeared, he seemed very calm. Too calm, no one slouches on restaurants chairs and tables like they are at home. This confirmed my theory, he’s on drugs. It was on my mind all evening. I sometimes have no issues asking difficult questions. it makes the date more interesting. The date only last two hours, but it felt like six.
Walking to the bus stop he asked me the question. “So, can I keep your number?” “Sure” I said. But my head was thinking, “fucking hell if you say no, no matter how nicely he will be pisssssed”. I jumped on the first bus that came my way. that evening he sent me some mixed up text messages, rude ones. But even for me (I’m dirty minded to the core), it didn’t make sense. Weeks went past and I managed to ignore him with one line sentences. Nothing too rude, but it would make sense I am not interested. Nope, that didn’t work. So I lied and told him I dating someone. For the next two days, I received countless calls and text messages. Wanted to me to remind him where I lived, so he could “pass through”. He wanted someone to talk to. Fair enough, but it wasn’t going to be me. Threats of going to the police didn’t work. After taking advise from a girl friend, I blocked his number. Pure and simple. Never heard from him again.
This is why I hate, or should I say hated dating. You meet loads of cool guys, but there is no spark or after the date, nothing happens for whatever reason (which seems to happen to me a lot). But all I know is, this is life. It’s how I want it to be. So I will just have to go on a few more bad first dates. To be fair it makes a good story to friends and potential dates. Plus makes things more colourful!
After the shitty/ some what colourful year I have had within the dating the world, I think its time to be more fussy. Don’t stand for the bullshit and cut it off. Basically, be up front like I am with my friends at times aka a bitch! Saying that I still have at least 3 dates from last year I still need to go on. We all love a trier! Plus I always pay towards something (well if they let me, which most do) so its cool. I’m not going for the free food :-).
Happy 2015 to you all!